When you completely surrender and give
your life to Christ… the truth is He will do AMAZING things. The other truth is that we are still human
and we often fail to recognize what He is doing. We fail to recognize truly how
amazing He is. Many factors play in to
the reality that what He is doing or has done does not match up in our minds
and hearts. Sometimes it is time that
causes the equation to fail, sometimes it is health, it may be hunger, other
times it is circumstances or even a lack of sleep. I’ve come to realize that it is always
combined with our feelings. Those
stinking feelings… I also know that Christ is not limited by any of these
things!
We had some training and we read
several books before we left. I was
ready to tackle the “culture shock” head on.
It reminds me of when I found out I was pregnant. When I make big choices or find myself in big
circumstances. I do my best to go into every situation with my eyes wide
open. I would feel like a fool if I
didn’t look at both sides of the coin… if I had not prepared myself for all
possibilities. So three months in I can
say this… just like having a baby and reading all the books, as wide as I open
my eyes I always find out I missed something.
I will not go into details about what I missed while preparing for
mother hood. However I can tell you that
as far as moving to another country… only one book slightly mentioned the words
“culture fatigue” and I read that book the first week we were here. I had no idea… I think it took its biggest
toil on me. The kids are resilient, and George well he takes it like a
man. I however have been exhausted.
Honestly I cannot think past this moment.
Many of you know I am serving at the
Christian school that our kids attend here in Guatemala. This is a blessing because I get to spend the
day in the same halls as my kids.
However it has been a huge challenge to go back to work after 12 years
of being a mom and homemaker. This I
know we no longer do what looks good and feels good. We now do what Christ asks of us or least we try!
George has been studying Spanish,
seeking God, and visiting small outlying villages. We are ministering to those we meet and have
come to know, but we also realize deep in our core that we are not with the people
group that God intends us to serve. We are here but we have not arrived. Our
plan was for George to visit many villages.
However circumstances out of our control… but in God’s have allowed
George to visit one small village of about 1000 people 5 times. Yesterday was my first time. Oh my goodness. Words cannot describe how I felt, what I saw
and what I know. As I sat on a stool on
a dirt floor amidst six to eight little buildings made of brick and corn
stock. I felt like I was on a survivor
TV set. Who lives like this? I grew up
with much less than anyone I know, yet so much more than anyone here. A great grandmother was sitting over in the shade
while the Grandma and her five daughters sat around talking to George and I. Their 22 children giggled and smiled and
repeated every English word I said. All
the men were at work. They pick and
plant black berries I think. They have
no cars; they have no means to go far.
The town has a little packed out school house that serves the kids k-6th. The school house is a reflection of the
corruption of a nation. Each little
building that surrounded us belonged to a portion of this large extended family. Each little building had just one or two
rooms. Each room was either a “kitchen” or
campfire in my eyes, or a bedroom. Each
bedroom had one or two beds. Each bed held three to four people. None of these were double beds and none of
these had box springs. There were ropes hung in the corners with clothes hug over them, a makeshift closet to hold the few extras they had. It was like
survivor… only the participants knew nothing else, no one is watching them, and no one is getting voted off. There is no prize at the end of a season. This is life and this is living. This may be the people group we will serve. (The reality is more than half of the people in Guatemala live in similar conditions.)
It is strange and difficult. It is obvious that new roofs and running
water would make life better, but these
people are not asking for anything, at least not for themselves.
However they are hungry. They are
hungry for physical food and for spiritual food. They are lost. They are stuck. They are surviving. They are not
thriving. What is the difference between
surviving and thriving? It is what I said in the beginning. Thriving begins with surrender…..
“When you completely surrender and
give your life to Christ… the truth is He will do AMAZING things. The other truth is that we are still human
and we often fail to recognize what he is doing. We fail to recognize truly how
amazing He is. Many factors play in to
the reality that what He is doing or has done does not match up in our minds
and hearts. Sometimes it is time that
causes the equation to fail, sometimes it is health, it may be hunger, other
times it is circumstances or even a lack of sleep. I’ve come to realize that it is always
combined with our feelings. Those
stinking feelings… ” Just as we need to understand that Christ loves us right where we are in spite of our circumstances or feelings. So do the people and children of Guatemala.
Please pray for us. We need the Lord to confirm this community, make it clear that this is where He want us! We need support and
discernment. At what point do we move
into to this little village? What will this look like for us and our children? How will we
ever show these people the lover of their souls?
How could we walk away and not invest our lives... the truth of Christ's life into a
group of people who have no way out? Please pray for us!
"How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? And how can anyone preach unless they are sent?" Romans 10:14,15
